TrishD – Trish Dooley coaching

November 1, 2022

Using the Enneagram with Teams

Over the last few months I have had the pleasure of working with an incredible team made up of 16 leaders. We have worked on individual and team leadership development through the lens of the Enneagram.

Starting from the belief that all great leaders have a keen self-awareness of how they are perceived by others, how they show up in the world; their world view, motivations and strengths; the culture they are creating, their openness to listen, be challenged and change.

When leaders are honest about their strengths and their ‘weaknesses’, they demonstrate the capacity to be open and authentic and model what real self-awareness looks like.

Self-awareness, the ability to be mindful, ‘conscious’ about what, how and why you do what you do, is the starting point to develop a growing insight of the same in others – those you lead. It’s also the starting point in developing an emotional intelligence, the ability to recognise, understand and manage your own emotions AND the capacity to recognise, understand and empathise with the emotions of others.

Simply put, if you don’t know yourself, how can you begin to know others?

We started the process with a day learning to understand the Enneagram as a system and tool and getting conversant with the 9 types and what this means for individuals, and teams in general and specifically for this team.

In between this and the second leadership development day, we started the work on self-awareness. All leaders did the Integrative Enneagram questionnaire (iEQ9) and had a 1:1 coaching feedback session. This was significantly impactful for each leader with many ‘Ah ha!’ moments as they learn so much about their personality and how this serves them well or not, their habitual patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving. Yet much more importantly, how they develop and grow, how this tool provides a roadmap to conscious and better leadership and relationships.

Day 2 consisted of each leader communicating their strengths and growth path to the whole team. To enable this, we worked on how to make everyone feel psychologically safe, how everyone could feel vulnerable yet supported. This was crucial to making progress with how they are together as a team. This process shifted the focus from our ‘self’ awareness to ‘awareness of others’. The team is also enhancing their emotional intelligence of others.

Then, who are we as a team? How do our personalities, our leadership strengths help us improve our team dynamic and cohesion? How do we apply what we know to different aspects of working relationships like communication, giving feedback, and our overall team performance. How do we deal with conflict & challenge, how do we work under stress and strain, how can we move from ‘forming’ to ‘performing’ as one?

Team Enneagram Types

We ended the day making commitments to ourselves and the team. Asking what each team member needed, they were invited to stand and request it. They then asked for someone to help them keep that commitment making themselves accountable for the change they were wanting.

I’m already excited about Day 3 where we move to the next level in our team dynamic work, looking at the gaps and how we use the expertise in the team to fill these.

“Because teams are complex and dynamic, they cannot be understood from a single perspective or at only one moment in time” Ginger Lapid-Bogda

February 14, 2022

Leadership and Enneagram Types 7-9

Here are the final three types E7-9, in the series of the enneagram and leadership styles. All types make fantastic leaders and while there are many strengths in each type, there are also growth paths to become even better, to integrate the strengths of other types into our own and to notice, accept and find ways to challenge those aspects of our leadership where we would like to adapt to be more successful in our leadership.

Starting with Type 7, ‘The Enthusiastic Visionary’
These spontaneous, optimistic, fun-loving people are a joy to be with. They appreciate and bring energy to everything, fascinated by new ideas, they are innovative and entrepreneurial.

Their strengths as leaders include their ability to see the big picture, their flexibility, desire to learn more and ability to make things happen while inspiring others as they lead.
Their growth includes, finishing what they start before boredom sets in, tempering their restlessness, following protocol and, slowing down to ’embrace the tedium’ while allowing others to catch up.

Their high level of activity can be a real positive but can also create tension as others are obliged complete the activities started by them.

Type 8, ‘The Active Controller‘. These strong, decisive, magnetic people exude charisma, energy and a lust for life. They are dynamic, direct, authentic and courageous, symbolised by the lion.

Their strengths as leaders include their ability to take charge and demonstrate their self-assurance. They make things happen and have impact, they are determined, reliable, supportive and fiercely protective of others.

Their growth is to accept their own and others’ limitations, be less intense and more tolerant and self-aware, and to be more in touch with their vulnerable side. They also need to be less confrontational as they follow their desire to change the world and to challenge injustice.

And finally, Type 9, E9, ‘The Adaptive Peacemaker’. These unassuming, easy-going and accommodating people always try to keep the peace and avoid conflict wherever possible. They seek harmony and comfort and are archetypal lovely people.

As leaders, their strengths include an amicable sense of fairness, their desire to play down their own achievements by placing their colleagues/team members in the limelight, their ability to listen to and validate the views of others and their acceptance of mistakes, remaining positive and optimistic wherever possible.

Their growth pathways include an acceptance of their own brilliance and not to always deflect to the team, to move into action more quickly and be more dynamic, to share and sometimes exert their opinion rather than always listen to others and, to be more decisive.

If you’re curious to learn more about your type and how you show up as a leader, do get in touch.

January 26, 2022

Leadership and Enneagram Types 4-6

Here are the next three types, E4-6, in my continuing series of posts looking at leadership styles through the lens of the Enneagram. Each of the nine Enneagram Types will show up in leadership, and in life, in different ways. All will demonstrate huge strengths as leaders but all will also have a pathway of growth both to better engage these strengths or through integration across the enneagram leaning into the strengths of other types.

Continuing with Type 4 or E4...

Type 4s are ‘Intense Creative’ people. They can be sensitive, expressive, intense and emotional, driven by being authentic and expressing individuality and being attuned to their emotions. They need to make a difference.

When they are at their best as leaders they are purpose driven, imaginative and inspiring, intuitive and courageous. They are usually open to exploring different ways to accomplish tasks and therefore don’t tend to restrict the creativity in those they lead. Because of their own innate internal emotional intuition, they can be good at understanding others’ emotions with tact, gentleness, and compassion.

Their growth path is to let go of their story and step into a sense of belonging of their team and organisation. They need to try to refrain from comparing themselves with other leaders and trust themselves, remembering they make intuitive and gifted leaders.

Type 5, E5 are the ‘Quiet Specialists’…

These types are driven by the motivation of ‘needing to understand’ and the pursuit of knowledge. They look for the meaning in life, why things happen and often need to intellectualise and analyse problems before them.

They can be shy, detached, forgiving, reflective and cerebral BUT they love being around people especially if they are learning and understanding something from them.

Their strengths as leaders include their ability to see everyone’s point of view and get to the core of the problem, their desire to research potential solutions, their innovation and drive to complete and their capacity to re-engage. Their motto is Think. Analyse. Solve.

Their growth is around lowering their boundaries and letting people in, being less self-reliant and independent and using the strengths of their team to complement their own rather than see these as threats.
If your leader shows up as a E5, spark their curiosity, give them time and space to process information, and always allow them time to reflect.

E6 are ‘Loyal Sceptics’.

These great team players do not miss detail. They are cautious, prepared, loyal and sensing, and they build strong relationships with others.

At their best as leaders, strengths include creating stability and safety, being the glue to the team, planning ahead and being alert to all the potential mishaps along the way.

Their growth is knowing that their ‘yes, but what if’ stance can sometimes feel distrustful to others, and ‘paralysis by analysis’ can slow them and their teams’ progress.

If this is you, try going with your intuition and take the risks you might always try to avoid. What’s the worst that can possibly happen?

Do any of the three types above (or in my previous post) resonate with you? How would you bring the best out of yourself in leadership depending on your type? How can you do this of others?

If you are interested in learning more about your type and your leadership strengths, get in touch.

The final three types E7-9 to follow.

December 16, 2021

Leadership and Enneagram Types 1-3

Here are the first three types in my series of posts on looking at leadership styles through the lens of the enneagram. Each of the nine #enneagramtypes will show up in leadership in different ways. All will demonstrate huge strengths as leaders but all have a pathway of growth either to better engage these strengths, or through integration across the enneagram leaning into those of other types.

Starting with Type 1 or E1….

We are ‘Strict Perfectionists’, we want to see good in the world, we often judge those around us, and we are principled and live by strong values. Our motivations are ‘Doing the right thing, avoiding mistakes and working towards self-improvement and self-control’.
Our #strengths include striving for high standards, being systemic in our thinking and role modelling by living our beliefs and values.
Our #growth is to trust others by relinquishing control, be able to delegate, value others’ input and accept and enjoy good enough and imperfection.

Type 2 or E2, otherwise known as ‘considerate helpers’….

These generous and caring individuals often take on leadership or central roles as they enjoy being able to build their influence and connections. They can be great in the limelight. They are motivated by helping and providing for others with a deep-seated need to be liked and appreciated.
Their #strengths include building strong relationships, engaging groups, communities and broader systems often standing out from the crowd. They are ambitious, strategic & goal-oriented.
Their #growth is to catch themselves out when giving unsolicited advice. Ask themselves, “Am I disempowering you by always being there? Am I smothering the creativity and growth of my team?”
You will reap the benefits of stepping back a bit, putting some of your needs first and delighting in watching others grow.

Type 3 or E3, the ‘competitive achievers’….

Type 3’s are charming, charismatic individuals striving for success and to be the best at whatever they take on. They can be ambitious, focused, task-oriented, adaptive and are motivated by their need to outshine the rest. They may have an overwhelming desire to prove themselves often worrying about their image and how the world sees them.

Their #strengths as leaders include always having their eye on the prize, knowing where they are going and being hugely energetic and organised multi-taskers who have a deep seated desire to be successful. They are driven, inspiring leaders and can focus their competitiveness on supporting others to personal achievement.
Their #growth includes slowing down so as to not lose people, allowing themselves to feel failure to learn from it and therefore allowing others to do the same, collaborate more and be open to others’ views and lastly, reconnect to who they really are.
If you are interested in learning about your type and your leadership strengths, let me know.

Types 4-6 to follow…

June 4, 2021

Becoming an Enneagram practitioner – what I’ve learned about me

So, this was the week I officially became a certified practitioner in using the amazing self-assessment tool, The Enneagram.

To be awarded this status, one writes a case study on how they have used it with a client to bring about deeper self-awareness and to help lead them to a fundamental shift in the way they think, feel, and show up in the world, towards a place of authentic integration.

I have learned so much about type, subtype, motivations, fixations, vice, and virtues to name a few, of my client, but I have also learned a great deal about myself. Some of these are ‘typical’ patterns of behaviours of a type 1, a strict perfectionist, and some of it is just me. Here are just some examples….

Wanting to put the world to rights

My worldview acknowledges the imperfections of the world and how I can work towards improving it, myself, and others. I am motivated to make the world a better place always with a view on what’s right and what’s wrong. This of course leads to judgement both of me, my inner critic can be very loud, and of others. I am trying to use this in a positive way of creating change, becoming an active campaigner, and lobbying for causes I believe in.

Conscientious

I am supposedly a stickler for rules and standards, good and bad, correct, and incorrect and being conscientious around avoiding mistakes. Is this another fear of being judged? I am slowly but surely moving away from the language of ‘I should, I must, I ought to’. Who knows what joy this may bring?

Fear of being criticised

This is the ‘vulnerability’ of a Type 1 – while I like to point out others’ imperfections, I’m really not that keen on someone pointing out mine. In fact, I dislike it intensely and will react defensively, possibly with anger. Reading this for the first time made me angry. Enough said.

Zealous

My subtype is actually a counter-type to usual Type 1’s in that I prefer to reform others than myself. I see the potential for things to be better and reshape people around me to help make those happen. I can hold my hands up to this, yet I don’t feel I get off too lightly myself in how I want to ‘better’ me. I’m learning to stop creating unrealistic expectations both for myself and others. I’m some way away from serenity but at least it now exists in my thinking.

Procrastination

In my striving for perfectionism, my case study took hours, possibly days, longer than was perhaps necessary. I found it really difficult to sit and write it, even parts of it, until I was absolutely sure I knew it was going to be the best I could do. I became quite judgemental, self-critical, and pedantic, driven by a sense that it was not good enough. And then, I spent even longer deliberating on whether to send it in once complete. Here lies my keenest area for growth; accepting and challenging myself to ‘what’s good enough’ and allowing myself to embrace ambiguity and imperfection in myself and the world around me.

The above is just another stage in my learning. There is so much depth to the Enneagram, it’s hard to know where to begin (or is that just a Type 1 talking?). Beginning is the step I would highly recommend though as I remain fascinated by it 6 months on and hope to be for many years to come.

It can be misunderstood by some as ‘another box to put people into’. It’s not. It’s a way of understanding why we do what we do, what drives us, our core motivations, and what we can do to better ourselves. Everyone wants to do that right? This is the gift that keeps giving in more ways than one.

February 16, 2021

Perfectionism – learning to work with it…

When I trained to become a coach, I felt I learned so much so quickly I knew I couldn’t possibly keep all of it in my head. I wanted to start coaching clients but how was I going to do that if I couldn’t access knowledge, strategies, and stories, as and when I needed?

So, I decided to create colour coded ‘prompt’ cards which would enable me to quickly reference anything I needed during a coaching session.

And they did. They were filled with information, too much in some cases, and soon, I just needed to see one word out of the corner of my eye and knew what would be helpful in that coaching moment.

When speaking with other coaches about this, they were curious about my need to get these in place before jumping in with my coaching.

Easy – I wanted each session to be perfect. The best it could be. I wanted to be the best coach and to do that, I needed everything perfect around me.

I’ve always been aware of my tendency to want to make everything as good as it can be but learning and understanding about my type on the Enneagram and my behaviours associated with this, suddenly all made sense to me.

As a Type 1, I recognise my need for everything to be structured, ordered, organised and there is little space for me to criticise myself for something I could control.

After all, the last thing I want is to feel criticised and not good enough – that’s my Type’s vulnerability. Learning about the Enneagram has opened doors for me both about myself, my motivations, my relationship with others and more.

I feel I have only scratched the surface of this incredibly rich system. I will soon be a certified Enneagram practitioner and I can’t wait to start using it with clients who I hope will find discovering more about themselves as insightful and inspirational as I did.

I don’t use these cards anymore, well, not all of them. But I know I’ll be making a new set soon and that’s okay.

February 15, 2021

Learning with the Enneagram

I have just started my Integrative Enneagram training (iEQ9) live from South Africa.

I’m so excited about the prospect of being an Enneagram practitioner and can’t wait to get started. I knew it was for me before I discovered its roots were founded in Pythagorean Geometry and Fractal patterns (objects whose parts at infinite levels of magnification, appear geometrically similar to the whole). I just knew there was a calling to delve deeper – self discovery, coaching and maths!

Here are two beautiful fractal images.

And as to the Enneagram, it’s a law of threes, patterns of threes. More in the coming days….

August 29, 2019

Why Leadership Matters (even on holiday)

I have spent two weeks this summer cycling from the north of Vietnam to Hoi Chi Minh City in the south – a long and potentially arduous journey, made more difficult with temperatures exceeding 35⁰C on some days. That said, it was one of the best experiences I’ve had in terms of personal and team resilience, commitment and achievement, all made possible by the incredible leadership of our group leader. I witnessed all aspects of what makes a great leader unfold over the fortnight all of which can be applied to leadership in all we do.

Clarity of Purpose

During our welcome meeting, we were re-introduced to the values of the cycling company and indeed, that of the leader. Why responsible travel was fundamental to our holiday choice, why getting to know the country, it’s culture, history, language was key to our experience and, why enjoyment, fulfilment and achievement was his and our intention. There was absolute clarity in what would be expected from us on a daily basis and an unshakeable belief that all were physically capable of the cycling journey ahead.

Team Spirit

The group members were from Europe, US, Australia, New Zealand with an age range of 18-67, all from diverse backgrounds. Some had experienced long bike rides while for others, it was their first; some were focussed on their personal goals while others were ‘just doing it’; some were anxious about their fitness levels while others tackled each day with an awe inspiring confidence. Despite these differences, there was a commitment to a common goal – all were to complete each day with a sense of pride in ourselves and in our team. There was a collaborative spirt fostered by our leader. He created a supportive camaraderie regardless of difference – ‘high fiving’became routine at the end of each day.

Positivity and Reality

Everyone can do this!The leader’s motto regularly heard over breakfast, during our morning briefings, as we mounted our bikes. Always accompanied by the reality of the day – the distance, the terrain, the gradient, the beauty of the landscape, the breaks. We knew exactly what was ahead of us with very few surprises. His experience of the journey fostered a sense of trust and assurance in the team.

Fear and Laughter

Cycling into and out of busy Vietnamese cities was something we just could not imagine – it looked terrifying. The number of possible calamities was too great to count. Our leader’s calm and protective approach soon diminished these fears, so much so, we often found the funny side, screeching hysterically as hundreds of mopeds came towards us. We laughed a lot – even climbing an unrelenting 10km mountain pass, gradient of 8-10%, we laughed. We found humour in extreme situations, each other, with

him and with people we met along the way. The good natured group dynamic enabled us to feel comfortable in laughing at ourselves and each other.

Endings

We made it! The sense of achievement was incredible both from an individual and team perspective. As well as organising moments to celebrate, our leader ensured we were able to have opportunities to reflect and share our highs and lows with each other. He was also incredibly keen to hear what he could do better on his future trips. This was one question where we had little to say – he was the best leader we could have possibly hoped for. He made our trip and for that we thank him. As to us……we’re planning to go away together next year – that’s team spirit!

April 4, 2019

Lessons leaders wish they had learned earlier…

As a leadership coach, I am frequently reminded that leadership is often learned ‘on the job’. No-one prepares you for; the countless decisions you need to make every day, the challenge of time, managing the external and internal pressures, bringing out the best in all, to name but a few.

While looking back to the early days of their leadership, I often hear leaders say, “if only I had said/done this earlier”, “if only I had been clear about this”, “if only I hadn’t said yes”. It’s always about lessons they wished they had learned earlier, the preparation for leadership.

There are repeating themes from most leaders I coach and while the following is not a complete list, it’s a start.

Know and set out your core values from day 1

Leaders often feel they have been slow in being explicit about what’s important to them. They are often hesitant at being too forthright with this as they believe it’s right to ‘know’ the organisation, its people and its history. Yet none of this knowledge effects what we believe in. If our values are truth, equality, social justice, compassion, ambition for example, what difference would that knowledge make? From the moment we set out our values, people begin to understand us and we can begin to make decisions based on these. We start from a transparent place not from one where there is curiosity or suspicion about our motives.

Accept that a life balance won’t always exist

There is little point expecting this to be the case when every day brings new unforeseen challenges. Our best laid plans for our evening ahead can be scuppered by 7.30am that morning. If we accept that we can avoid disappointing ourselves or others. What we must do instead is ensure we find pay back. If that evening activity was lost to us, how do we recompense later that week. How can we remove something from our priorities that just isn’t that urgent? Or better still, how can we delegate to others….

Be confident about delegating

Some leaders see delegation as a form of weakness, offloading because they can’t cope. For some, only they can do the job well enough. Others are able to delegate to the point of abdication.

I ask my clients to remember when they were entrusted to carry out something by their leader. Then, how did this make them feel, what did they learn, how did they grow, what responsibility went with it? Words repeated back at me were; trusted, empowered, privileged,excited. Perhaps it’s time to flip the term delegate into something much more positive; entrust, empower, develop, invest.

It’s okay to take time to make decisions, providing…

…you make them.

The most frustrating thing for those awaiting decisions is not necessarily the outcome but the knowing it will take place and when. As leaders become more experienced they are able to make quick decisions especially on recurring issues, and especially when they are clearly values based. The difficult ones may need longer to accomplish.

Rather than ruminate over the pros and cons of the decision in the first instance, focus on the information you will need to know to make it, who do you need to speak to, what do you need to read, what advice do you seek? And then, set a deadline for when you are able to do this. Communicate this deadline to offset any frustration for those who wait.

How we lead other leaders

Setting out expectations for how we want our leaders to lead is something to consider before day 1. Bad habits are difficult to break so ensuring this is clear and explicit and, more crucially, modelled from the off. Picture the best leader you had…what was it about their leadership that inspired you, how did they model leadership, how did they bring out the best in you?

It’s okay to make mistakes

Of course it is. If you are committed to perfection, it’s not going to work. We learn and grow from mistakes and if we model failure, we allow others to do so too. We give them space and confidence to take risks and if it doesn’t work ask ourselves the question, what would we do differently next time? Most organisations expect their people to take risks and make mistakes – if they were ‘perfect’ on appointment, how will they develop in the organisation?

While it would be wonderful to have thought through all these, we must acknowledge that we too are not ‘fully formed’ leaders when we step into our new role. And, like our teams, we will mistakes and learn from them. We then find the courage and determination to reset, to draw a line in the sand and put our lessons learned into practice.

October 10, 2018

Creating a Coaching Culture

As a leadership coach, I am often asked to visit organisations to coach individuals or sometimes a whole tier of leadership in order to support them becoming more advanced leaders.

As part of the completion session of the 1:1 coaching, I explicitly frame the skills I have used through the relationship and encourage each client to use those they believe would be beneficial while leading others. Ultimately, I am trying to develop a coaching culture within and across the organisation, attempting to enable individuals to become coaches themselves.

However, this alone does not achieve it. Studies across organisations show the following must take place to truly embed the culture:

There is a desire for it at the heart of the organisation. It is a philosophy, a set of values in the way in which everybody is encouraged and expected to work. There are key objectives linked to its integration
It is modelled from the top. Line management meetings in the main are coaching conversations where a coaching skillset is evident for example;

great listening and paying attention
great speaking with clarity and intention
empowering, supporting and encouraging
openness and honesty
powerful questioning and curiosity
goal/action focussed
commitment and responsibility

It is part of a learning and development plan for all while formal training is available for key leaders. This is properly funded and is part of the strategic plan
There is access for all to a mixture of internal and external coaching
There are key measurable objectives linked to the benefits of it. For example, the improvement of;

working relationships
leadership development
self-esteem and confidence
individual and team performance and subsequent outcomes
retention and recruitment
resilience, emotional intelligence and self-awareness
well-being and life balance

The impact is measured transparently and relates to the goals set by the organisation in its strategic plan. This might involve before and after surveys, 360-degree reviews etc.

There is an increasing trend for organisations to place coaching at the core of their ethos. The undeniable benefits can be abundant and extensive and can make a radical difference for the development of individuals and the success of the organisation.